One of the hardest things I’ve had to deal with in my 20’s is constantly being my own cheerleader. It’s so easy to want that confirmation from others(family, friends, etc.) as validation that you’re doing well but the truth is, that isn’t their job. It’s yours. Self love and self care are so important when building yourself up. Confidence plays a huge role in that too. Being kind to yourself and giving yourself daily encouragement shouldn’t be or feel like a task and if it does, maybe you should do it more often so it becomes second nature.
During the height of my depression I struggled with confidence in all areas of my life. I felt like I was a terrible student (procrastination is my weakness), I wasn’t happy with my job (I felt it took too much time away from school but bills had to be paid), my body looked physically great (but all I could see were the imperfections), and emotionally I was a mess so I didn’t feel capable of being worthy of love (which led me to put up with too much shit from the wrong guys). After a few very, hard but eye opening conversations with my counselor, he recommended that I come up with my own daily affirmations and remind myself of those affirmations whenever I began to think negative. So I chose my affirmations to be “I am worthy, I am worth it, I deserve it.” Telling myself those statements felt so foreign in the beginning because in all honesty, I didn’t feel it was true. I didn’t feel worthy or as though I deserved the things I desired and that saddened me. I had to get to the root of those feelings. I had to tell myself those affirmationss everyday (and still do) until my perspective began to change on how I viewed myself/my wants and not what everyone else felt was best for me. I made small changes everyday and I continued to repeat, “I am worthy, I am worth it, I deserve it” and by doing so my confidence grew a bit more each time. I would wake up, see those words and think to myself “I got this” and set out to tackle the day. If my day ended with me feeling defeated, I repeated those affirmations as a reminder that I may feel defeated but I have not failed.
Finding that confidence and encouragement doesn’t come easily to some, for me, it is still a DAILY challenge. However, I’ve made a tremendous amount of progress in my journey and I’m so happy I’m not the same scared girl I use to be. I am a young woman actively sticking by my decisions without fear of judgement from others. Yes I have my days where my confidence is lacking but those 3 affirmations still hold true. “I am worthy, I am worth it, I deserve.”
So find your inner Beyonce and get shit done. Never stop being your own cheerleader.
Peace & Blessings